A watched pot never boils...
I finished that romance novel about a week ago. It was pretty good. The main character reminded me a lot of myself, except she was way more aggressive when it came to pursuing a person of the opposite sex. And girlfriend sure did get her man in the end. I have to give her her props on that one. The title of this blog is a line that I took away from the book (apparently it's a saying that old folks use).
While the saying insinuates that when an individual has expectations, nothing ever results, I have an issue with it. Yeah, it's true when it comes to actually cooking that water never seems to boil rapidly while you're staring down at it, waiting. It always seems to happen when your back is turned-unexpectantly. This too applies to relationships. When you're sitting there waiting for someone to come into the picture, or better yet, waiting for a phone call or any other form of recognition from that special someone, it never seems to fail that time is never on your side.
But my question is: "If you don't look at the water, how do you know if it is boiling?" True, having expectations will set you up for disappointment, but if you don't have expectations, how will you be able to distinguish between trash and treasure? In a way, if you think about it, 'expectations' can be considered synonymous with 'standards.'
After just having a good long telephone conversation (something that I have not had in a long time) with a very close friend of mine, I realized that it's okay for me to feel the way that I feel when it comes to this whole ordeal. Now, me being how I am, I was trying to defend him (Richard); I was saying, "Well maybe he's just busy. No one ever responds to an emailed holiday card." Eugene told me that I was over analyzing and that everything would be fine-"Most people, especially boys, don't respond to those things." But then again, there is a thing called common courtesy. Especially after I've spilled my guts to him. The least he could do is give me some kind of response. A simple, "Just emailed/called you to say hey" would have sufficed. Or would it have really?
Knowing me, I probably would have wanted to know how he is really feeling; wondering if I altered his way of thinking by what I said to him. Because that's how I'm feeling now. I just want to be able to sit and talk to him, one-on-one (not via computer or phone). I want to be able to see not only how he'll respond to the subject when in the same room with me, but how I'll respond as well. I want to know, better yet, I want closure. Is that so much to ask?
This whole, "Stop analyzing!" is really difficult, not because that's what's 'normal' for a 'typical female' to do, but because that's just normal for me, period. So, you know what? You're just going to have to spare me. I can't help myself. Excuse me if I just happen to take a peek at the pot.
While the saying insinuates that when an individual has expectations, nothing ever results, I have an issue with it. Yeah, it's true when it comes to actually cooking that water never seems to boil rapidly while you're staring down at it, waiting. It always seems to happen when your back is turned-unexpectantly. This too applies to relationships. When you're sitting there waiting for someone to come into the picture, or better yet, waiting for a phone call or any other form of recognition from that special someone, it never seems to fail that time is never on your side.
But my question is: "If you don't look at the water, how do you know if it is boiling?" True, having expectations will set you up for disappointment, but if you don't have expectations, how will you be able to distinguish between trash and treasure? In a way, if you think about it, 'expectations' can be considered synonymous with 'standards.'
After just having a good long telephone conversation (something that I have not had in a long time) with a very close friend of mine, I realized that it's okay for me to feel the way that I feel when it comes to this whole ordeal. Now, me being how I am, I was trying to defend him (Richard); I was saying, "Well maybe he's just busy. No one ever responds to an emailed holiday card." Eugene told me that I was over analyzing and that everything would be fine-"Most people, especially boys, don't respond to those things." But then again, there is a thing called common courtesy. Especially after I've spilled my guts to him. The least he could do is give me some kind of response. A simple, "Just emailed/called you to say hey" would have sufficed. Or would it have really?
Knowing me, I probably would have wanted to know how he is really feeling; wondering if I altered his way of thinking by what I said to him. Because that's how I'm feeling now. I just want to be able to sit and talk to him, one-on-one (not via computer or phone). I want to be able to see not only how he'll respond to the subject when in the same room with me, but how I'll respond as well. I want to know, better yet, I want closure. Is that so much to ask?
This whole, "Stop analyzing!" is really difficult, not because that's what's 'normal' for a 'typical female' to do, but because that's just normal for me, period. So, you know what? You're just going to have to spare me. I can't help myself. Excuse me if I just happen to take a peek at the pot.
posted by W8ingPatiently at 4:31 AM
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